I feel so suicidal right now?

my family is always so hard on me...they will disown me if they know i am gay.. .my mother basically made my already bad day the worst when she told me she wants me to leave home and never come back after i forgot to wash some dishes....i am also bulimic and its like my body tells me to throw up everytime i have a rush of feelings like this....do other gay guys do that? oh god..i dont even know why...im not fat at all im only 132 pounds and im suddenly worried about becoming a fat guy?? my life is is shambles i dont know what to do i wish i could just die.... what is the easiest way to kill oneself?